


When I Look (All I See Is You)

by notyouricon



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Accidents, Alternate Universe - Afterlife, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Not K-Pop Idols, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cancer, Character Death, Goodbyes, Grief/Mourning, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Lung Cancer, M/M, misfortune
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2019-07-01 07:51:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15769773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notyouricon/pseuds/notyouricon
Summary: It's been a good run, a very good run. He's had his fair share of love, his fair share of sorrow, he made some great friends, lost some too. But his time has run out, luck won't be on Felix's side this time.





	When I Look (All I See Is You)

**Author's Note:**

> Fair warning, I teared up while I wrote this. It isn't that sad? Maybe I'm just a big baby. Anyways, enjoy the story! Sorry it isn't super long!  
> (Not beta-ed)  
> \--A

Lee Felix was just about as stubborn as they come.

When he was five, he got caught in a house fire. He made it out alive, with only minor burns and smoke inhalation.  
At seven years old, he found himself lost in the woods while camping with his uncle and father, he was found after spending one night alone.  
When he turned ten, his parents took him out fishing on a boat, a storm changed course and wrecked the boat, only Felix made it out alive.  
At fifteen, a group of friends set out on a hike, in a series of events, two of the young men, one of whom was Felix’s boyfriend, fell off a cliff and were killed instantly.

Nothing that fate threw at the boy worked, no incident, accident, or simple mistake made any difference, Felix just kept living. By now, he was 18, almost 19, and he had seen many highs and lows, but this had to be one of the worst days of his life. Almost six months ago, he had been diagnosed with extensive stage small-cell lung cancer, and was given 8 months to live. He knew that his life had been hard, but he had lived through fire, water, and nature, and now it was his own body taking him out. He forced smiles at the doctors, told them he didn’t want to go through chemo, or radiation, not when the chances that the treatments would work were so low. He would rather let go, like his family, like his dear friends. Woojin-hyung visited him often, so did Jisung-hyung, they told him not to be afraid, that things would turn out okay. So he didn’t worry, he lived his life to the fullest, for the last five and a half months he had checked boxes on his bucket list.

But now, sitting in a hospital bed, hooked up to monitors and machines, he felt trapped, caged in. The doctors came and saw him every hour on the dot, like clockwork, and he was tired. Coughing and wheezing took a lot of energy when you spend most of your time doing it. It was 11:05 when the last doctor left, taking with him a couple machines and scans, Felix knew it was time, knew the doctors just weren’t telling him everything they could to ease the pain. Picking up his phone, and blinking away tears, Felix messaged the groupchat, writing paragraphs of messages for his friends. “Goodbye,” was his last strained whisper as he shut his phone, making sure there wasn’t a passcode on it. Resigned to his fate, the young man lay back in bed, head cradled on pillows and hands clasped over his belly. 

The last thing he heard was the droning beep of the heart monitor before everything went blank. 

~~~~~

 

Felix blinked, once, twice, again, it was so bright. The lighting in the hospital had been so dim, what had happened? After his eyes adjusted, he looked around, finding himself in a field, or rather a clearing. He stood up, wondering why he wasn’t coughing, where had the hideous hospital gown gone? He spun in circles, and it wasn’t until he slowed down and looked closer at the forest that he saw people. He waited, surely they knew what was going on, right? From behind him, he heard a throat clear, and he turned slowly, running a hand through his hair to look. What, or rather who, he saw made him gasp in shock. The figure of someone he hadn’t seen in well over two years, since the accident, since the cliff. A shape he knew well, hidden inside hoodies and skinny jeans, “Changbin-hyung?” He breathed, eyes widening.

The other simply held out a hand, and opened his mouth softly, “Hello, Felix.” He said, voice steady, but there was an edge of happiness to it, but sadness as well. He gave a wry smile, stepping towards the younger boy, arm still held out. 

And Felix took it, reached out and laced his fingers through the other’s own. It was a familiar sensation, but at the same time it was odd. Stepping closer yet, Felix let himself be guided into Changbin’s arms. “How? You- you died?” His words were unsure, how could they not be, here he was, standing, breathing, when he had just been in the hospital. 

The older boy nodded, “Yes, I did. And so did you, Felix.” He said, voice soft,”This is where we go when we die, this is the After.” Felix blinked, obviously confused. “Come on, I’ll explain more later, there are others who want to see you again.”

As Felix was led into the forest, the duo were joined by a few others, his mother, his father, his sisters, and eventually, Chan-hyung, his other lost friend. So they walked, Changbin and Felix, hand in hand, Chan’s arm slung around his young friend’s shoulder. Felix’s family, smiling and chattering behind them. Finally, they were together again, finally they could rest.


End file.
